Week 4, as Promised.

This is the only time the Bears will be mentioned in this entry. There. Now that I've gotten it out of my system, I find it worth mentioning that first, I am four-for-four on last week's picks, and overall, 6.5/8.*

Without further ado, it's been a big week for news in the NFL.

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Drew Brees! Drew Brees! Drew Brees! Brett Favre! Brett Favre! Brett Favre! Despite his positively explosive start against Philadelphia and Detroit, Drew Brees has not thrown a touchdown pass in two weeks. Nonetheless, the New Orleans Scoring Machines continue to put up impressive stats as Pierre Thomas and ilk run all over opponents. Is it a dual run-pass threat (that makes the Saints very scary indeed), or is everyone so scared of Brees that the Pass Coverage Machine has been proverbially cranked up to eleven?

On the other hand, Brett Favre, with the completion of a very over-hyped Monday Night Football contest that drew the largest cable TV audience ever (ESPN), has now defeated every team in the league. Sports anchors everywhere touted Favre as the greatest quarterback ever! It's a Monday Night Favregasm! Favre-lous! Brett Favre! Brett Favre! Brett Favre! Favre has bested Aaron Rodgers in a revenge game! Poor, emo, sulktastic Aaron, always second behind BRETT FAVRE, who is almost 15 years older!

Not to editorialize, but the problem in Monday's game was NOT Aaron Rodgers. Statistically speaking, Rodgers outgained Favre in many categories. Favre threw for 271 yards, Rodgers for an astonishing 384, and Rodgers ran 16 yards compared to Favre's -2. On the season, Rodgers has thrown for over 200 yards more than his former teammate, and only has a QB rating of 3.6 points lower. 

After taking a pounding from the Vikes' D-line, Rodgers will spend his bye week sitting in Jake Delhomme-esque poses and alternating between in the Jacuzzi and in traction. Source: Newscom.

Where the Packers were deficient was on offensive line. Missing starting left tackle Chad Clifton, the O-line, including left guard Daryn Colledge, tried desperately to overcompensate and threw incomplete blocks. The line generally found itself unable to finish plays properly, and, in making these (temporally) short blocks, folded like a lawn chair repeatedly on passing downs. Rodgers was sacked eight times, 4.5 times alone by defensive hyper-end Jarred Allen. Favre, meanwhile, had the Great Wall of China in front of him. Whilst his monstrous O-line engaged the defenders (who were unable to get to him once), Favre found enough time to do anything he wanted to, including picking apart the Pack's secondary, answering his fan-mail, and crocheting several doilies. 

Keep in mind now that despite being folded, spindled, and mutilated in the backfield, Rodgers still managed to throw for almost 400 yards. Statistically speaking, who is the better quarterback?

This is Why You Go For It: In a dead heat between two Ohio teams, the Browns and Bengals were tied in overtime at 20-20 in a shootout.  The Bengals were 4th and 11 on the Cleveland 41, with only 1:04 left. Coach Lewis was content to punt for the tie, but Carson Palmer went ballistic on the sidelines, begging him to go for it, and on 4th down, he scrambled from the shotgun 15 yards for the first down, and a 31-yard field goal gave Cincinnati the win, as they moved to 3-1. Carson Palmer: Niiiiiice move. Coach Lewis: "Punt for the tie!?" What kind of psychology is this? You never settle for a tie. You try and win the game!! This is the same kind of poor, demoralizing coaching that gives rise to "kicking the field goal just to reduce the margin of defeat." What next? Running off the field squealing in admission of a loss? Unfortunately, I think this sort of psychology may bode ill for the Bengals in the future, unless Palmer has anything to say about it. 

Football/Politics Crossover: There has been a lot of gossip around the league about the ownership of the St. Louis Rams. Conservative radio host Rush Limbaugh announced Tuesday that he would be interested in going halvsies on the failing franchise with Dave Checketts, owner of the St. Louis Blues.(The 670 Score) Second and One promises to always remain apolitical, as sports and politics are best not kept too close to each other (like politics and religion) but I am (editorializing again) not sure if this is a good idea just due to the polarization it will create amongst Rams players and fans alone. There is enough controversy in the league already over everything ranging from equipment sponsorships to Braylon Edwards' jibber-jabber with LeBron James. Some boiler-room discussion (for those who enjoy this sort of debate) can be found here. (St. Louis Today).

Or it could be terribly amusing. If Limbaugh buys the team, in addition to continued losing, we might get to see:

An increase in rush plays, exclusively to the right;

Tickets being sold only to the wealthiest 10% of the general public;

QB Marc Bulger interjecting mandatory Clinton-bashing into all postgame press-conferences;

And a new ability to purchase to purchase oxycontin at concession stands!

Amusing Announcing: During Monday night's Brett Favre Brett Favre Brett Favre, the announcers screwed up multiple players' names, referring to kicker Mason Crosby as both "Nason Crosby" and "Sidney Crosby"**, the latter a combination of Crosby's name and that of Rookie Vikes WR Sidney Rice. In addition, Packers TE Jermichael Finley's first name was stumbled over repeatedly until he was eventually called "JaMarcus Finley." Second and One is awaiting the call from Jermichael Russell out in Oakland. 

Obligatory Fighting Nucleophiles Update: As both Knox and Hester were injured early Sunday, the Fighting Nucleophiles, official fantasy team of Second and One, suffered terribly at WR. Additionally, because I was playing that one guy who had Philip Rivers the week that Philip Rivers went all PHILIP RIVERS, the 'Nukes were handed their worst defeat of the season. I'm hoping to recover this week, following the "Start whoever plays Detroit/St. Louis/Kansas City/Tampa" rule, employing Santonio Holmes, Wes Welker (a gamble), and Sidney Rice (picked up on waivers), who not only looks to be breaking out as a receiver, but who also recovered two onside kicks on Monday Night.

Still nagging at me is the tight end decision. I had Kevin Boss in for Brent Celek on the bye week. Brent Celek has been burning up the scoreboard this season, as he is a favorite target of Eagles' backup Kevin Kolb. Statistically, I have been sitting on the league's best receiving tight end and didn't know it until this morning! However, as Donovan McRibb likely returns this week, nobody is sure whether he'll give a sniff to Celek, despite the latter's ability to score. Boss, on the other hand, may get more than his share of touches against an anemic Raiders defense. Ah, too many important decisions. 

And that's all for now. Remember kids: if you can't come up with anything witty to say, why even include this blurb? 

*The extra half-point is for calling the Pitt/Cincy skirmish "closer than one might think," despite getting the outcome wrong.

**Both brothers of Bing Crosby, apparently.