Draft

Did anyone watch the draft this past weekend? I had the opening round on as ambient noise, from Commissioner Goodell's opening remarks, through the Giants and Jets fans going ballistic, to the Drew Brees cameo, while I fooled around in my house and played games on my computer. I didn't see the other six rounds, as one night I had to go to some kind of work function and the second night I was with a group of people who wanted to watch Avatar instead (which, despite looking silly in the previews, was actually a decent movie). I have had this entry written for about four days now, but a whole host of things at work caused me to neglect it. I was, however, sent a variety of e-mails and was reading various news sites all weekend, where I discovered that some very unexpected things happened in the 2010 draft.

What the...? The first, of course, is that Tim Tebow got drafted in the first round by the Denver Broncos, whose "continually trade down" strategy seemed to confuse everyone. Of course, this climactic part of the draft came when I decided it would be a good idea to take a shower, so I was left standing there soaking wet trying to figure out what had just happened. Tim Tebow to the Broncos? Did I slip on the soap and hit my head? First of all, by drafting Tebow, I don't think the Broncos organization is showing the public that they have a lot of faith in Kyle Orton (or Brady Quinn for that matter) unless they plan to play Tebow off-position*, which seems extraordinarily unlikely. More concerning, I'm not sure Tebow's SEC-style is a good fit for the Broncos' offense, which seems to be built around short passes and trying to psych out the opponents' cornerbacks, or at least until the team totally collapses around mid-November. Nonetheless, some teams have made this work (albeit inconsistently) like the Titans, and I believe Vince Young's success last season raised Tebow's stock considerably, but more often these experiments fail hopelessly (see synonyms at "Tarvaris Jackson" and "JaMarcus Russell"). 

So Suh Me: The Lions, who have been attempting to rebuild their team since approximately the Eisenhower administration, drafted both Cal RB Jahvid Best and 307-lb Nebraska tackling machine Ndamukong Suh. Now, we here at Second and One just love people with funny names, and according to many sources, the name "Ndamukong," in some tribal language from Cameroon, means "House of Spears." Is there a cooler name for a defensive tackle than that? He might as well be called "Killer" or "I'll tear your ACL." Can you imagine this guy pounding Brett Favre or Jay Cutler into the grass? It's enough to give offensive linemen an instant stroke, if the 10 cheeseburgers they eat every day doesn't do that first. Additionally, the Lions drafted a cornerback and a defensive end, along with -wait for it- another wide receiver. 

Nevermind the obvious questions like "Is he a good fit for the Lions' defensive scheme?" or "how does he feel about living in Detroit?" - Does he really have a house of spears!? (Source: jetswit.com)

One of the great cognitive disconnects in football, to me, are the defensive backs whom, despite being total animals on the field, are the nicest guys you could possibly imagine when they're not playing football. Ndamukong Suh seems like this kind of guy. Nice and soft-spoken, and also donated several million dollars to his alma mater for a scholarship fund. How about Jonathan Vilma, who's a linebacker for the Saints, who donated tons of money to disaster relief in Haiti? Or Charles Tillman, who lobbies congress and the FDA to approve experimental heart treatments? Or my favorite, Troy Polamalu, who admits his favorite hobbies are spending time with his wife, playing the piano, and gardening? It's extremely hard to imagine someone who earns a paycheck by assaulting people for 60 minutes every Sunday coming home and re-potting begonias. 

What the...? Part 2: The Bears, in round 6, drafted Central Michigan University QB Dan LeFevour, who is best known for his MAC record-breaking run-and-gun style. Yes, read it again. The Bears had long talked about adding a veteran QB as Jay Cutler insurance, but absolutely nobody expected them to take a rookie. However, as a Bears fan, I'm rather excited about this prospect (and, if my comments were still functional, I'd probably be spammed into oblivion by pessimistic Bears fans). Here's why. 1. The Bears need QB depth. Period. Caleb Hanie hasn't taken a snap in who-knows how long and the team is one twisted ankle away of having Devin Hester try to throw the ball and run down the field to catch it. 2. I have actually seen LeFevour play several times (albeit, against my favorite college team), and the kid's really no slouch. He also started 51 straight games (an NCAA record), holds several conference passing yard records, lead the CMU Chippewas to 4 bowl games, and made my favorite college team's linebackers go absolutely insane chasing him around. Also, according to the buzzing Chicago media, LeFevour is actually a Bears fan. (chicagobreakingsports). Now, the Bears are known for having a collective draft IQ of like, four, but I actually would give them at least a B this year. They saw where talent was, and they went after it. Notable other pickups include free safety Major Wright (from Florida), defensive end Corey Wootten (Northwestern), and OT J'Marcus Webb (who is six-foot-eight, and is from West Texas A&M, wherever that is.)

And now, we conclude by listing the best, worst, and weirdest of 2010:

Best: By trading away picks, Seattle was able to acquire both former Titans power-back LenDale White and Jets RB Leon Washington. This is extremely good for the mediocre Seahawks, who are so poor at rushing (26th last season!) that I can't even name a starting running back (and I'm generally pretty good at naming the starters for many positions - even kickers.)** 

The Jaguars also play in the lamely-named Jacksonville Municipal Stadium. "Municipal Stadium?" What the heck is this, the city power plant? (Source: football.ballparks.com)

Worst: The Jacksonville Jaguars, who are suffering at QB, drafted defensive lineman Tyson Alualu (Cal) in the first round, and followed with four other defensive backs. Wouldn't it make more sense for the Jags to have taken Tim Tebow, who went to a city where there are now more quarterbacks than air molecules, and, who Second and One dryly notes, is actually from Jacksonville? The Jaguars are currently one of the weakest markets in the NFL. They sold only around 74% of their seats last year, prompting the largest profit loss of 09 and all of this talk about moving the team to Los Angeles. (ticketnews.com) Wouldn't it make sense, both morally and economically, for the Jaguars to have drafted someone who could guarantee that they'd sell out the stadium every game? 

Weirdest: The San Francisco 49ers were ranked 22nd in passing last season and a mediocre 18th in ability to score. Wouldn't it make sense to draft a quarterback? Yet, the 49ers drafted three defenders, two offensive linemen, and a tight end who admits he likes hitting people until they bleed.(sfgate.com) While this is great for a team that wants to become more physical, who are these big boys protecting? Alex Smith, who had a worse QB rating last year than both David Garrard and Vince Young, if that's possible. Wouldn't it make more sense to draft a young gunslinger?

Anyway, this concludes most of what I wanted to say about the draft. I'll hopefully be able to resume more frequent posting.

*WR? TE? Team Chaplain?

**Theirs is Olindo Mare, and no, I did not just cheat and look that up.

More 2ndand1 Draft Mania!

The 2009 draft draws to a close. 

And I would have to say the thing that surprised me the most (moreso than Mr. Irrelevant being a kicker, moreso than the abundance of draftees from Cincinnati, and moreso than the Lions drafting a tight end when their defense is a sieve) was the situation with Graham Harrell.

I understand that often those who cruise in college have the wheels come flying off in the pros (Brady Quinn and JaMarcus Russell come to mind), as the style of play, mentality, and team chemistry are often totally different. Often teams often look for a certain style of play (e.g. traditional vs. "Run and Gun"), a certain degree of versatility, or it's even psychology (no team wants to have an egomaniacal drama queen on the field). 

But Graham Harrell. This kid was a Heisman Trophy candidate, with a rating of 160. One-hundred-and-blooming-sixty. As a Bears fan, during most games (where I'm cursing and smacking my face into my coffee table), I'd give my right kidney for a QB who could even make three digits. In 2008, Texas Tech, with Harrell at the helm, was an absolute scoring machine, even managing to black out the Colt McCoy show.* I had watched some of TT's games mid-season, and Graham Harrell's accuracy - even from sixty yards out - was positively staggering. I found myself watching intently for magnets in the football, or invisible wires; it was like watching someone performing open-heart surgery with a pickaxe, for want of better descriptor.

So why didn't anyone pick up Harrell? After a bit of analysis and chitchat, my predominant theory is that while he is intrinsically good, he likely couldn't/wouldn't find a good offensive style match in the NFL. Texas Tech also had an amazingly good offensive line that gave Harrell enough time to connect. These guys erected the Great Wall with split-second precision. If he could play with a line like the Chargers, Steelers, or Colts have, maybe he could do some damage, because I've seen these three teams literally hold the line long enough for the quarterback to:

a) Sight and find his receivers;

b) Gain a read on the defense; see blitzes coming and conduct proper evasive maneuvers;

c) Pull out a lawn chair, read a novel, bake a lasagna, sing an aria in German

A friend of mine believes that, if pressured too much, Harrell would likely become a Rex Grossman character, resorting to the "close your eyes and chuck it" strategy - and this kind of slop is what single-handedly knocks the wind out of offenses. If there's no connection between the offensive line, the quarterbacks, and his intended receivers, nothing gets done. I won't go any further into the the Grossman analogy because it'll just make me eye-crossingly angry. 

Perhaps someone will pick him up in the coming weeks. It would be shameful for a talented kid like that to be without a job.

***

There are teams that had good drafts, and teams that had bad drafts, like every year.

Good Drafts: 

Chicago. The team is in dire need of wide receivers after injuries and releasing Marty Booker. They drafted three. Also of note are two new additions to their weak secondary, Oregon St's Al Afalava (Safety, 6th) and cornerback DJ Moore from Vandy (4th). It would've been nice to see them take the likes of Brian Hoyer (or Graham Harrell) as a backup, however, if Cutler goes into a diabetic coma on opening weekend or something.

New York Jets. After Chad Pennington came back to bite them in the backside and the end of the Favre experiment, boy, did these guys ever need a quarterback!

Indianapolis. RBs and Receivers. Good work. Harrison's gone and Joseph Addai is getting on in years. I think it's also good they took a kicker in the 7th round as Vinatieri's grown sensitive to everything from the temperature in the stadium to the phase of the moon.

OK Drafts:

Minnesota. If Percy Harvin's hardware can take a NFC-style beating (unlike most of the SEC's receivers), he'll be a fantastic balance to Adrian Peterson. Their later rounds may aid in rebuilding the defense. Or maybe not, because they're the Vikings.

Detroit. The Lions made a good choice in Stafford, and were pretty mediocre in everything else (vide supra.)

San Diego. Two new offensive guards. Wow. They want to give Phil Rivers enough time in the pocket to yell at the fans, the chain gang, and seemingly offensive pieces of exercise equipment in addition to the rest of his offense!

Baltimore. A cornerback and another linebacker? Puh-lease, the Ravens' defense is not where their problems are. Building a better offensive line may give Joe Flacco more time to concentrate, however, and was a decent move.

Bad Drafts:

Cincinnati. I read somewhere that both Andre Smith (1, OT, 'Bama) and USC's tackling machine Ray Maualuga (2nd) both have arrest records already! Way to clean up your act, Bengals! (There used to be a joke that if you want to be in a drug ring, get in the huddle with the Bengals. Or was it the Dallas Cowboys, circa 1995?)

New Orleans. Three defensive players and a punter? Looking at this crew, logic says they'll drop the weight of the world on Drew Brees for yet another season, play defense, and kick it right back. I would have taken a running back myself in the wake of the Deuce McAllister salary cap mess!

Anyway, that's all for now. Remember kids, if there is anything we learned last season: If you squander your time on the clock, 0-and-16's a sure lock.

*Does anyone remember this? They knocked off the 'Horns, stormed the field before the game was even over, and likely got fined into the Stone Age by the NCAA.

2ndand1 Draft-Mania!

Brief post now, full recap later!

The Giants drafted a cornerback from New Mexico named DeAndre Wright. I find this funny because I know a guy named DeAndre Wright -spelled the same way and everything- and he is quite fond of the sport. D, if you're reading this, congratulations on the new job with the G-Men!

***

I find it rather odd that Curtis Painter from Purdue has been drafted (albeit by Indianapolis, who needs quarterbacks like Andy Reid needs cheeseburgers) ahead of MSU's Brian Hoyer. In 2008, Painter had a positively abysmal and inconsistent season with the Boilermakers, his sole standout performance (to me, at any rate), being running up the score on a paste-eatingly dumb IU team for Joe Tiller's retirement present.* Is this really worth the NFL scouts' time? Or is this part of Peyton Manning's grand scheme to eventually become offensive coordinator? On the other hand, MSU made it all the way to the Capital One Bowl before being dispatched by Matthew Stafford et al. Will Hoyer get drafted at all?

***

Perhaps the most interesting hilarity I've seen all day: In the sixth round, just a few minutes ago, New England drafted a fellow from Hawaii named Jacob Ingram. Jacob Ingram ...is a long snapper. I have two things to say about this.

a) This is actually a draftable position? I always thought it was a rotating special teams position (sort of like "holder," although this is usually the kicker's job). I learned something new today!

b) Seriously, Patriots. If you've got nothing better to do than draft a long snapper, you shouldn't even be on the clock. Rather, you shouldn't even be in the blasted thing to begin with. You can always go for offensive guards or defensive tackles for your third string. You could draft yourself someone to cut the sleeves from Bill Belichick's sweatshirts. Heck, you could go out and save the environment, or stop this new Swine Flu that seems to be causing a bit of a ruckus, or fight crime on Mars, but you instead draft a long snapper? Unbeleiiiiiiiivable!

Non-football news, the new statistic today says that Detroit is still the most violent city in the US. I could make a Lions joke, but I'll take the moral high ground and say that the most violent crime pertaining to Detroit is today's unabashed stomping of the Pistons by Cleveland. Whoa.

More to come tonight! Remember kids, draft beer, not absurd special teams positions!

*Interestingly, the only team worth watching in the entire state of Indiana at the end of last season were the Ball State Cardinals.