The Joke Writes Itself...We Just Don't Know The Punchline

Ah, I'm back. Had to go to a Big Italian Wedding in Chicago this weekend (the bride was my aunt) - complete with rooms full of Bears fans, a Catholic mass, pasta, toasts in Italian, and at least one person sitting on a cannoli. The downside: lousy wireless reception in church, so I'm a bit out of touch with the college scores right now. We'll correct for these technical difficulties in the coming days.

First, this story came to me today. (ESPN New York) A volunteer football coach at a high school has been banned from coaching because (following a spat with safety officers and referees over a botched fumble call) he apparently pulled down his shorts and mooned the opposing team's fans. Additionally, the bad call also caused a shoving match that resulted in the ejection of both head coaches. The two schools in the game boast the funniest names of any high schools in the world: Boys and Girls High and Campus Magnet (the latter won 16-6). Unfortunately, we've already gone over every joke that could possibly be related to nudity and football* so there isn't much to be said beyond that I hope the whole thing winds up up on Friday Night Lights at some point in the future, and that I think I'm going to do this to my television the next time the Bears find themselves on the, er, wrong end of a BS call.

...Stay tuned, folks.

*Offender is the "butt of everyone's jokes", play is a naked reverse, every pun on "tight end" and "defensive end" known to man, offense lost their shirt, defense lost their pants, etc.